Wind Is Coming

Workout: moaning in despair over this disastrous weather

If you bothered to click on that link (you didn't), we've been "advised" of the possibility of 100 mph winds this afternoon. Delightful. I should probably be showering since the power could very well go out, but whatever; dedication, folks.

Here's some shitty pictures of shitty weather from today:

Slush! Oh joy!

Whazat? It's Jeano's soul being crushed.

It's been raining. In December.

But hey, at least wet dog's cute (and smelly).

I'm mostly bummed because I was going to go hiking today. That obviously did not happen. Guess it's a Harry Potter/grad school application kinda day. To be concluded with a Django Unchained bloodbath. Happy trails, kids. Here's hoping we don't lose power.

Difficult Deliberations

Workout: 4.5 slow miles on the treadmill, many hours of dancing (it counts if it's past midnight, house rules!)

So about those 7 miles... my bad. Last night turned out to be ridiculously booze-filled, and when I woke up at 12:30 I hardly knew which way was up. Apparently grandma can't hang with the kids anymore. I then proceeded to waste away in bed for a few more hours, during which the concept of running barely registered. I finally decided I needed to do something, at least, but then spent another hour or so wondering whether to use a recently-procured guest pass to the fancy pants gym in town or use our shit 'mill in the hot, windowless basement. In case you hadn't heard (what's wrong with you?), Anchorage was disgusting today with extremely high winds and temperatures in the 40s, which pretty much ruled out outdoor running (think ice sheets). In the end, the necessity of having a bathroom/vomit receptacle VERY CLOSE BY, and the desire to watch a newly-rented Harry Potter movie on iTunes (side note: I'm on a huge HP kick right now. I hated the first two movies and vowed never to see another, but in my confused hungover state I gave the second to last movie a shot. It was a great success) decided it: hot, windowless basement treadmill or bust.

I had grand delusions of feeling incredible once I started running and finishing the full 7 miles, but roughly 30 seconds in I axed that goal and told myself I'd be happy with 4.5. 4.5 it was! I'll do 7 on Monday.

I'm an Asshole

Workout: cross country skiing, 45 minutes

Today I was an asshole. That's right, I went skiing. Cross country skiing. I hadn't done it in a year, but I guess it's kind of like riding a bike.  Due to unfortunate circumstances, my skis managed to disappear while I was still living in New York, so this was the first time I was able to get out there this season, using skis from middle school that I realized still kind of fit as long as you don't wear any socks. Sanitary, it was not.

Stinky.

Apparently using running as your only form of physical exertion leads to some pretty activity-specific muscle strength. Within about thirty seconds, it became abundantly clear to me that none of that strength has made its way to my upper body. I guess I'll just have to give it some more time to find its way up there (that's how it works, right?). I happen to think that cross country skiing is the best all-body workout in that it seems to target every little muscle, even ones you never knew existed. This is why skier boys have the sickest bodies. This is also why I found it necessary to stop every 20 seconds or so to wheeze.

So anyway, I went skiing and it was hard. I decided I need to do it more often, if I can muster the energy for it. Jebus knows my arms could use it.

I was originally going to run today but since I want to shift back to Saturday long runs, I opted to cross train today and run long tomorrow. That means this past week's mileage was only 14.5 miles, but I think I'll survive. It's the holidays!

I'm really pissed at this warm weather we're having. The temperature doesn't bother me so much as the winds that tend to accompany this type of weather. And the disgusting, melty, sticky snow. This winter gets a D for snowfall. You hear that, snow gods? You suck!!

On Parents and Running

Workout: a much-needed rest day

Today, I've got some thoughts on parents and running. I rarely think about it but was reminded when I didn't get the one thing I put on my nonexistent Christmas list this year: a running leash for Bailey with a rope that retracts into the collar when you want to let the dog off the leash and don't feel like running with a heavy brick in hand. Now, lest you start thinking horrible thoughts about my parents (because, I KNOW, not receiving a retractable dog leash for Christmas is a tell-tale sign of bad parenting), they are amazing. Really, really amazing. They gave me way too much for Christmas. Just not that damn leash. They don't "get" the whole running thing.

My parents kind of treat running like it's a drug I huff in a corner late at night. Oh, you want examples?

• When I go running with Bailey, they call it "taking Bailey" or "going out with Bailey," but they won't use the dirty R word.
• In the lame family Christmas letter that gets sent out every year, they mentioned my love of hiking but not a word about running, despite the fact that I spend much more of my time on the latter.
• Did I mention the retractable leash?
• Last year when I still lived in Dumb York, I got to come home for Christmas. When I excitedly announced that I was planning to run my very first marathon, I got zero reaction. None whatsoever. I couldn't believe it! Isn't everyone excited about marathons?!
• I'm not sure they've asked me a single question about running in over a year.

I could go on, but I don't want to. I don't know for sure why my parents aren't supportive of my running, but I can guess. My family has a history of arthritis and I very well may be on a one-way trip to two fake hips in twenty or thirty years. I think my parents believe I am needlessly hastening this progression, which is entirely possible. But you know what? I'm not doomed to have arthritis. Odds are I'll get it, but I've got some time (don't shove this in my face thirty years from now when I'm still blogging and can hardly walk). And fake hips have come a long way-my various family members who have them don't experience any pain. If I lived my entire life worried about the possibility of having arthritis twenty or thirty years down the line, I wouldn't do anything. I've got the same philosophy on bears. Jeano's life knowledge: coming to a motivational audiobook near you.

Now, does it really matter that my parents don't understand the whole running thing? No, not really. But it would be nice to be able to come home from a particularly awesome run (oh, you didn't know I live with my parents? Cool kid over here) and tell them about it. Or to talk to them about my training, particularly since I plan to attempt another marathon this spring (more on that some other time). It would be very strange indeed to finish a 20-mile run and then come home and pretend it didn't happen. And on race day? Will I have to drive myself to the race start? Will they come watch me? Who knows. These are the things that occupy my brain for a couple of seconds once in a blue moon.

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Because every good post needs a picture, here's Bailey and a few of her billions of new toys. She was so overwhelmed by choice that she spent about a half hour frantically running back and forth touching each toy but not actually picking anything up. A special lady.

My precious

Tacos, the Ideal Running Fuel

Workout: 3 miserables miles, 10:45 pace

A word to the wise: don't eat tacos and try to run immediately after, even if it's only 3 easy miles. Worst idea ever. Keeping those tacos down was almost as hard as the running, which sucked.

I really didn't want to do this run. I was pretty sore from yesterday's 4.5 miles and Sunday's new post-stress fracture distance PR (7 miles), and I generally just didn't feel like it (blame the fact that Christmas is over). But we all know that the ones you don't want to do are the most character-building or whatever bullshit, so I did it anyway. IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD. Which is the worst place ever to run except for the fact that I can leave from my front door. I decided to stay mostly on flat ground, which confined me to a 3/4 mile strip of road. Kill me.

I was actually only going to do one mile outside (because when Bailey sees me putting on running stuff I can't run without her) and come in for the last two on the treadmill. Once I got outside, though, I realized that things sucked enough already and that throwing a treadmill into the mix would mean I wasn't finishing my run. I stayed outside.

I wore my elf shoes, which pretty much erased that weird pain-that-I-guess-really-is-a-pain I've been experiencing on top of my foot. I'm assuming that wearing my tiny Yaktrax prevents my foot from spreading out as far as it usually does. The elf shoes are pretty baggy and allow my foot to do whatever it feels like. I'd like to wear them more, but as today showed, they're slippery as hell on snow. I'll have to see if I can find any Yaktrax that will fit them.

O Yaktrax, where art thou?

My dumb paces.

The less dumb view from my dad's office.

Tomorrow is a much-welcomed rest day, and I'm planning to rest the shit out of it. Getting over Christmas is hard.

A Stroll Thru the Hood

Workout: 4 1/2 neighborhood miles (aka "hell miles"), 10:35 average

Merry Christmas! What an unoriginal start to a post! But really, it's the most wonderful time of the year, haven't you heard? Anchorage has been gifted with a bounty of new snow, which is pretty much the best thing ever. 

Our day started at a local school, where we walked Bailey.

She brought the new toy that I got her (side note: buying presents for dogs is way more fun than buying presents for people), and that she's already managed to chew up. I'd give it a day or two before that thing's history.

I swear she's really into it.

Christmas was ridiculously fruitful. We got the best thing ever: a FAKE-BUT-REAL-LOOKING FIREPLACE, just like my neighbors have. Real fires are nice and all,

but come on-warm flames at the push of a button?! Welcome to the lap of luxury.

I decided to run off my excitement with 4 1/2 miles around the neighborhood. It was snowing a lot. I took this hilarious picture after I finished. I truly have a talent for taking disastrously unflattering photos.  If you ever need a wedding photographer, give me a holler. Notice the snowball falling off my right eyeball (your left).

Running in my neighborhood blows. All hills and no scenery. Today it was made tolerable by the fact that it was snowing, but all the "someday you'll thank yourself for these hills" in the world didn't make me any happier about it. Isn't it funny how when you're sitting on your couch you feel like you could run up Everest (piece of cake!), but as soon as you begin to actually run up something you immediately panic about heart explosions?

My times were slow,

but hopefully the elevation stats make up for it. I'm really, really slow on downhills because I sort of think they were responsible for my surprise stress fracture during an incredibly hilly half marathon earlier this year (I had trained on the flat roads of New York) so I'm too afraid to bomb down them.

 My street. That sign says "speed hump." Making this gal giggle for 10+ years. This is the only flat area in my neighborhood.

Enjoy your feasts and festivities, you krazy kids.

Pre-Christmas Post-Christmas Depression

Workout: cutting massive chunks of meat

My Christmas Eve has been perfect, and like I said yesterday, I'm already depressed I have to wait a whole year before I get another one. Why was I such a jaded asshole about being slammed with Christmas spirit on November 1? Why wasn't I soaking it up?!

My day started with four hours of sausage making. You read that right. Anyone who's known me for more than 5 minutes can tell you that sausage is my favorite thing ever. I was meat sweating HARD this morning. We made ninety pounds of sausage. Ninety pounds. Also, it's impossible to make sausage without using the most sexually suggestive language ever. So much cranking, stuffing, thrusting, twisting, pulling, etc. It made this immature gal giggle.

My day's only gotten better since then, and I'm looking forward to a wholesome evening with my folks. That and my neighbors' annual awkward Christmas Eve party. Every time I go to this thing I'm told "You're going to have so much fun, there's a group of college kids here so you'll have loads to talk about!" Because the shared experience of having attended an institution of higher learning at some point in the past means you have so many things in common. These kids are always from, like, North Dakota too, so, well, there's that.

Happy Holidays from this Alaskan jogger.

Post-(non)-Apocalypse Embarrassment

Workout: 7 miles, 9:45 average

MISS ME?! Because I sure as hell didn't miss you (by "you" I mean my automated sexbot readers). Truth is, I've been hiding out in my underground bomb shelter because the world was supposed to end. December 22 was a little awkward at the office. But really, I've just got friends in town. It's hard being this cool.

Yesterday I helped out at a Food Bank of Alaska event so didn't run. I made up for it by hitting up the always beautiful Coastal Trail today for 7 miles. It was delightful. I started on a new portion of the trail and ran north instead of south. I had to keep Bailey on a leash much more than I typically like, but in return for my responsible dog ownership I got to run right along the water. It was awesome, if a little windy.

The most beautiful city in my world.

That's FROZEN OCEAN.

Mounts

This run went really well. Bailey got a distance PR and I got a post-stress fracture PR. I kept the pace relatively easy and felt fine during and after. I will say that running for more than an hour these days seems like an awfully long time. I don't really listen to music on runs anymore for safety reasons and because I don't need to block out dumb city noise like I did in New York, which may have something to do with it. There was a time when 10 miles passed in a (peanut butter) Jiffy.

If you care:

You have to stop a lot when you're running with a questionably trained dog. It's my parents' fault.

I was pretend listening to this song for almost the entire run. Damn you and your breaking up, Civil Wars! I can't get enough of these guys. Every time I think I've heard all of their songs, I stumble upon a new one. I don't think they would have broken up if they knew that the Jogging Jeano would be so pissed about it. I realized roughly halfway through my run that the lyrics were actually really relevant to what I was doing: "Run, run, run away;" "Run, run, run and hide;" "Run fast as you can." Also, I love Hunger Games. The end.

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I love Christmas but haven't really had time to think much about it. Now that I finally have time, I'm trying to cram a whole lotta Christmas spirit into three days. I'm already depressed it's almost over.

Gen Whatever-er

Workout: 4 of the HARDEST miles that have ever been run by anyone, anywhere (given my status as a gen y-er or z-er or whatever, I am allowed to make dramatic assertions like that)

Hot damn. There were several moments during my run this morning where I thought my heart might explode. I had a totally misguided hunch that Powerline would be both packed down and free of skiers. Well, I was right about having it to myself, but it was NOT packed down, especially after the first mile. I knew I was likely in for a hard run, but after one of the laziest weeks of my life, I was ready to get back at it.

Well, "get back at it," almost meant calling in a helicopter to get me the hell out of there. Things started off great, and I was happy to be back at Powerline, but almost immediately the snow started getting deeper and my heart rate skyrocketed. Running down the steep hill half a mile in that I hate so passionately, the "oh shit" thoughts started to flood in, as did the "I don't have a will!" and "I don't have anything to leave people in a will!" thoughts. I kept going, though, and things only got worse. I started getting desperate. I knew if I could just make it to the turnaround point I'd be fine. The last half mile I was CRAWLING. I looked at my garmin and saw 20:xx so thought, "Thank god, I've got less than a minute left before I get to turn around." Turns out it doesn't work that way when you're running 12-minute miles. Those last few minutes were agony.

Fortunately, the view rocked.

Missed you.

My crawling splits:

As tends to happen, once I turned around I was rewarded with a slight downhill and felt awesome within minutes. Even the hell hill wasn't as hellish as I had imagined. We gen whatever-ers really do have a flair for the dramatic.

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It's funny how not working (or just having more time in general) means getting your run done is going to take longer. When I have an hour and a half between classes to run 4 miles and clean myself, I run 4 miles and clean myself an hour and a half. When I have 5 hours, however, you bet your ass I'm going to take five hours. That's just how it goes.

Intrepid Seniors

Workout: a short li'l hike

Here's something Anchorage-y for y'all.

Icicles! Winter has come. Also, this house is in the middle of my parking lot downtown. Confusing.

I just realized something: two days from now is the darkest day of the year! I mean, it's the end of the world, but more importantly, it marks the day when we FINALLY start getting some of our daylight back. Although honestly, it hasn't been bad. And we all know that complete darkness is more flattering than natural light anyway.

You know what suffered the most as a result of doing nothing for a week? My hygiene. I mean, I wasn't that disgusting; we're talking maybe two days without showering. Chill out. Showering may be the absolute worst requirement of being accepted by modern society (BECAUSE IT'S SO BORING-ALL YOU DO IS STARE AT A WALL and, you know, clean yourself), but after coming in from the cold, a scalding hot shower feels incredible. And when you sweat as much as I do, skipping a shower isn't even an option. It's something I do automatically. But when I'm not working out, I forget all about it. That's what happens with boring things. Keeping myself clean last week required a huge effort because all I did was sit on my ass. I'm glad to be back on track.

Today, "back on track" meant a short jaunt in the woods up by Powerline with the derg, who finally loves me again. It was short but delightful. I love breathing in freezing cold air. It just feels so pure (it's not-Anchorage gets bad air quality ratings when it's cold. Surprising, isn't it?).

Scenes like this make me feel like I'm in a little hobbit village (and five years old).

I got it into my head that it would be dark at 3:15, so we were only out for forty-five minutes. I hauled ass to the high point in this area and booked it back down. Totally unnecessary.

At a high point looking at a much higher point.

I took this at 3:15.

This is essentially the same picture.

It makes me so happy to see seniors out and walking somewhere like this, especially when it's cold. I saw several today. I hope to be that hearty when I'm 80.

Back to Blissfully Ignorant Things

Workout: 4 miles

Well, I've started semi-normally reading blogs again (I've just been opening them in Reader and then collapsing them because it bothers me to have unread posts in my stream). I wasn't avoiding them out of protest or anything, they just seemed more boring than usual. I will say that I continue to see post after post about how "This isn't a time for anger, this is a time to come together and support the victims while they heal." It made me wonder briefly whether I'm an asshole but it's okay, because I decided I'm not.

It just bothers me to no end that there's this pervasive attitude, especially around these oatmeal blogs, that "Well, yes, it's all very tragic, but there's nothing we can do about it so we should just pray this doesn't happen again." But guys, this is America, god dammit! We're always talking about how we can do whatever we want! Whether you think the problem is gun control, our mental health system, or (ugh) not having enough religion in school, there are things you can do to change the status quo. I don't even need to point this out but really, where would we be if people's mentality had always been "This sucks, but there's nothing I can do about it?" We'd be living in a significantly less awesome society. I will end by asking, yet again, that you call your representatives and tell them your thoughts on all this. Or keep praying. Whatever, your choice.

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It's not all doom and gloom in these parts. For example, I just went on an awesome run! Let's talk about it.

You know how you always call bullshit when incredibly fit people take a week off of running and then claim after their first run back that they've lost all their speed and endurance and feel like a tank? Well, I'm not incredibly fit BY ANY MEANS, but I can confirm that this does actually happen to us ordinary people. Or at least, this ordinary person. Today's four miles felt surprisingly difficult and not at all springy and doe-like as I was expecting.

It was painfully beautiful out but also painfully cold.

I went with that dumb dog of mine to the dog park. Here are some pictures.

I ran two miles yesterday, but prior to that I took a week off. Not one of those breaks where you're still lifting, yoga-ing, and swimming for six hours a day, but a legitimate break. I did nothing. My eating habits were atrocious. I fueled for yesterday's run/hike with a burger and fries for lunch and pizza for dinner. I finally had the courage to weigh myself and, to both my pleasure and disdain, I was exactly at 142, as I always am. Maybe we'll talk about this some other time (probably not), but I have the unique talent of staying at the exact same weight regardless of what I do or eat (within reason). Great for when I'm devouring everything but not so awesome when I really work at it.

I did feel a bit of pain on top of my foot, which was the initial reason for taking last week off (a reason that turned into having a lot of shit to do). I'm not positive, but I think it might have something to do with how confined my foot is when it's cold and I'm wearing a million pairs of socks and my extra small Yaktrax. I may have to venture out without those guys for a few runs to see how it feels but I have to say, once you've seen the Yaktrax light, it's hard to go back. We'll see.

So was I happy enough for you guys today? 

As I Was Saying...

And just like that, the posting streak is over. Part of that was finishing those soul-crushing essays but really, I didn't have it in me. Talking about running just seemed so dumb.

AAAAAAnd, collective groan as you all think "Jeano, you've already mentioned the shooting! You did your civic duty! You're supposed to have a bullet point saying how sorry you are for the victims, and that you're sick over it. Maybe mention a prayer. Then, you never mention it again and start talking about how you had the BEST clam chowder EVER!!!" Fuck no. Look, guys, I'm not Mother Teresa. I'm not going to be sad for the rest of my life. In fact, I had a good weekend, full of laughter. I now find myself permanently planted next to our new Christmas tree. You can't be sad next to a Christmas tree. It's science. But you know who's going to be sad for a long fucking time? Exactly. You can say you're going to pray for the families, and that's very kind of you. I know that for many, praying is the only thing they can think to do. But honestly, what is praying REALLY going to do? It's okay to be outraged, and for more than one bullet point.

You know what upsets me the most? In my job, I spend a lot of time talking to the best and brightest about why our government sucks. After the Benghazi tragedy, we were inundated with calls, which continued until only a couple of weeks ago. People were upset, and understandably; there was a lot of confusion and misinformation out there. They wanted something done about it. Friday morning, I braced myself for the deluge of calls I was certain was coming. Twenty-seven people were dead, twenty of them just babies. They didn't sign up to go to war-torn Libya. Their parents signed them up to go to a nice and seemingly secure elementary school in rural New England. So how many calls did we get? Not a one. Not a single damn call. I sincerely hope that people were just in shock, and that tomorrow they'll prove me wrong. Although I've got a sneaking suspicion it won't be the anti-gun folks calling. Please, call your representatives. I'd love to talk to you. I'd love to be able to tell the guys upstairs that the number one caller issue is gun control. It would make my day.

If you're pissed about me getting very slightly political, get off my blog. Or, post a comment telling me how dumb I am. Your idiocy can live in infamy in a tiny, nearly nonexistent corner of the interblogs.

The Worst

Guys. We fucking suck. We just do. We have so utterly failed to protect those who need it most out of fear of those who need it least. I am neither eloquent nor tactful, so I'll simply direct you to others who say it better. Now, we wouldn't want to "politicize" this tragedy, of course not, that's impolite, so let's just stop there and say nothing more about it like we always do. The rest of the world is looking at us with disgust and we deserve it. Lay it on me, g

In Which I Awkwardly Praise My Readers

Workout: I should probably just get rid of this daily recap

And thus continues one of the most sedentary weeks of my life. I wish I could say that was an exaggeration. My gimp foot that doesn't even really hurt is a good enough excuse for sitting on my ass, but I'm also just busy.

First off, a photo. Let's slap an Anchorage-y label on it so we can cross that off the list.

The remains of yesterday's dump

I happen to think this is hilarious. That is an obese man, on his knees, handing something to a confusingly short fellow obese man. And they're covered in snow. I was kind of in a post-final daze when I decided it was hilarious so I could be way off. There are a surprising number of similar statues on my campus (did I just call it my campus? I don't know that I've ever considered it "my school" before. A thought for another day).

Today was the most anticlimactic end of finals ever. In past years, I could be found drinking myself into a merry stupor (sorry, typo; I meant celebrating in a healthy, responsible, and totally sophisticated manner), but not today. Today I got to spend the rest of my day working and writing an endless number of application essays. I could, and very much do, go on at length about the hell that is writing these things, but I'll spare you.

I know you're rage reading right now. I can hear it. "Jeano, if your life's so stressful as you WON'T LET US FORGET, why the fuck are you on the interblogs spewing your shit?" First off, how do I copyright "interblogs?" Secondly, thank you for your concern. It means a lot to me. Moving on, I am usually laid back to the point of extreme annoyance, but there is something about this blog that compels me to write each and every single day. Of all things to be anal about, I chose this piece of shit. To each its own. Although dare I say that blogging has actually helped me in the soul-sucking endeavor that is writing these statements of purpose? No, really, it has.  Now, you may think what I write is shit, and you'd be absolutely right. However, forcing myself to get something down on the electronic page each and every day has made the whole process of writing less intimidating. I guess what I'm trying to say is, thanks readers-who-are-probably-actually-sexbots. You mean a lot to me. My final reason for blogging is so obvious it hardly warrants mention: I'll link to this video that I didn't actually watch (because, let's face it, it's probably dumb) instead. 

Fortunately, not everything sucked this week. For example, I started listening to this song incessantly. I can't stop. I'm not a god-fearing person (or even a "god person"), but I have an unexplained attachment to these kinds of songs. It helps that the (no longer) Civil Wars sing it. It's just so happy! I don't know any of the lyrics, so for all I know it could be depressing as shit, but it makes me want to jig.

Ask and Ye Shall Receive

Workout: unclear

I haven't decided whether I'm going to run today. I know, I know, I said my weird foot pain is gone, but almost immediately after I wrote that, I felt something. It's not even really noticeable, but I'm a freak so I'm mildly flipping out (if that's possible-I guess that would just mean "worried"). I may try some jogging later just to see what's up.

It's snow central here in Anchorage!!

I was only at work for three hours.

I've gotten over my fear of winter driving for the most part, but downtown kind of looked like a war zone when I left (my office closed down because of shitty roads). I almost couldn't get out of the parking lot (there was a lot of tire spinning), but once I did, I was actually having a lot of fun driving around. It was sort of like Mario Kart, only without the cute cloud man that helps you out when you wipe out. The fun lasted for approximately 5 minutes when I had to get on the highway. It blew. Every time I had to switch lanes there was a second where I thought, "This could be the last thing I ever do." I'm not dramatic. Spoiler alert: I made it home in one piece. Anchorage kicks ass at plowing snow, so assuming it stops coming down at some point, I think the roads will be fine by tomorrow.

On a depressing note, this news story freaked me out. Basically, this serial killer who killed a local barista admitted to police that at one point he hid in the woods exactly where I've been running and planned to kill a couple hanging out in the parking lot. He ditched his plan when two cops showed up, but it got me to thinking about my own safety. Now, the odds of a serial killer hanging out in the woods waiting to shoot me and my dog are slim to none, but on the other hand, as this random website just told me, lightning most certainly can strike twice. I'm not saying I'm not going back to the Coastal Trail. That would be dumb. But I am saying I'm going to have to think about it some.

Random: I was doing the Times crossword last night (obsessed), and one name in particular seemed out of place. You see it? What's an allegedly attractive but REALLY, TOTALLY, NOT AT ALL football player doing editing the Times crossword digest? And where the hell is my man Shortz? Oh, you mean you haven't seen Wordplay? Get on it, that movie's the shit. I'm looking back at old crosswords (as one tends to do) and this Brady character is all over the place, with nary a Shortz to be found. What's the deal? I'm confused.  Edited to add: when I said "confused," I really meant dumb. The football star edits the Digest, not the Crossword. This is why I'll never amount to anything.

Math is Hilarious

Workout: stress

Well, I stuck to my guns and am not running today. It's easy to keep promises to yourself when it involves doing absolutely nothing.

My foot actually feels fine. After a stress fracture one's bound to interpret any funny pain as another serious injury even when it's nothing. I'm not taking any chances though, so I'll run tomorrow. Whatever. Running's the only healthy form of stress release I've got, but who needs that when beer exists?

I wanted to show you something funny.

Math! Hilarious!

Just kidding. Math is serious shit. What's funny, though, is that I didn't think I'd have enough space for all my nerd formulas on the double-sided index card I was allowed to use on my final this morning. Consequently, my handwriting was absurdly small (that's a 3 x 5) and ended up covering only three-fourths of one side. Typical. What isn't funny is me bombing this test (unless you're sick and twisted which, hey, we all are). I'm blaming its 7:00 a.m. start time.

My stress has partly paid off with some new and exciting things getting figured out this week. Everyone hates it when a blogger's all "HUGE NEWS I'M EXCITED ABOUT AND WANT YOU TO BE EXCITED ABOUT BUT YOU WON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS FOR WEEKS AND WEEKS!" so I'll just come out and say I figured out my employment situation for next semester. I guess that when I put it like that, it doesn't sound that exciting but guys, money is always exciting.

That's all for today. We'll get back to Random Shit Tuesday next week. Deal with it.

Snow Storm Catcalls

Workout: 4 miles, 9:37 average

What's stranger: running in -15 temperatures, or running while it's snowing? I think it's the former but apparently Anchorage-ites think it's the latter.

Beautiful, right? Compare with October.

It wasn't even snowing that hard. Just a dusting. Anyway, I got three cat calls while running, which is an increase of infinity percent (any number divided by zero is infinity, right?). I don't get it, but if strangers want to give me a false sense of badassery, I'll take it.

This doesn't look snowy or even very pretty, but I took it so you will see it.

It is SO much warmer now that it's snowing. No more of that -15 shit. 25 degrees, baby! Like I said, heat wave! Although if it goes above 32, melts everything, and then freezes again, I may just murder somebody (full disclosure: not really).

I started my run at approximately 3:00 p.m., and it was already getting noticeably darker outside. I was running along the road to school and assumed the street lamps would come on at some point but alas, they never did. It actually didn't end up being an issue, although it was pretty dark by the time I finished. My Yaktrax gave me such impeccable traction I could hardly tell I was running on snow.

I guess running while it's snowing makes me go faster?

I think that may have been a dumb idea because now my foot tendon hurts. May have to bail on my run tomorrow because I'm the caution queen these days. Considering I have a 3-hour calculus final starting at 7:00 a.m. (oh, the humanity!), I probably won't feel like running afterward anyway.

Speaking of 3-hour calculus finals, I've got to go. At least I got one final out of the way this afternoon. Isn't finishing a final the BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD? Does that mean I'm not cut out for grad school? These are the things that keep me up at night.